My ADHD Story

My name is Emily.
I am 19 years old, and I was diagnosed with ADHD in 1st grade. After meeting with a child psychologist for six weeks, my mother did extensive research on how to best raise a child with ADHD and how to best equip me to live my daily life. Lately, I have been feeling the need to share my personal experiences of living with ADHD.

First of all, what is it? What do all the letters stand for?
Attention Deficit
Hyperactivity
Disorder

I put the first two together because it is meant to read like that. (Really, it's supposed to read AD/HD) ADD is a lack or concentration and attention. ADHD has the added behavior of hyperactivity within the brain and nervous system. The Amen (Ah-men, not Ay-men) Brain Clinics have done extensive research on the brains of ADHD patients and have reconstructed the way it is studied, diagnosed, and treated. They have wonderful resources, including an online comprehensive test to help point out which type of ADHD someone has, as well as, the option of going through a 30 day plan that will guide someone through learning to cope with their personal type of ADD. I recently took the test, and I have a combination of Over Focused, Temporal Lobe, and Anxious ADHD.

"Over focused ADD is typified by cognitive inflexibility, trouble shifting attention, being stuck on negative thoughts or behaviors, worry, oppositional, argumentative, and a need for routines."
"Temporal lobe ADD is typified by a short fuse, misinterpretation of comments, periods of anxiety, headaches, and abdominal pain, as well as memory problems."
"Anxious ADD is typified by inattentiveness, distractibility, disorganization, anxiety, tension, nervousness, and a proneness to physical symptoms of stress, such as headaches and G.I. (Gastrointestinal) problems." All of these put together make a lot of sense now.

After I was diagnosed, my mother and my pediatrician decided to try flax seed oil pills to see if that had an effect on anything. I took those for about a year while my mother tried a new drug called Straterra to see how it worked and if there were any negative side effects associated with this new class of drugs. After a year of being on it and having great success with it, mom asked the pediatrician if we could try Straterra for me. I did very well on it, and I stayed on it for nearly 10 years. Last August, I stopped taking it (not because I wanted to, but because I kept forgetting, imagine that), however, I felt it was doing more harm than good on the days I did remember to take it.

After a few weeks, I had a really hard time breathing one night. We couldn't figure out what it was, and we thought maybe my asthma had resurfaced. I went to the doctor a few days later and she said everything sounded fine.Turns out I had my first anxiety attack. So on top of learning how to cope with no medication, I now had to learn how to cope with anxiety issues. It's been a...hard year and a half, but I think learning this all now in college is better than in the workforce where there is no sympathy for mental illness. I think this year and a half is just the beginning of my journey with this, and I already know so much more than I did.

I've learned how to describe ADHD to people without it. Think about your brain as a standard door. It opens one way to let things from the outside in, and the other way to let things from the inside out. For most people, this door closes appropriately; not so for people with ADHD. For people like me, the door never closes. There is a constant wave of stimuli flowing into our mind, and our mind is desperately trying to read it and react to it all while trying to focus on our own thoughts as well. Yes, this means our brain is working in what could be considered overdrive.

All the time.

Always. Forever.

And we can not make it stop.

ADHD is like have a Ferrari motor and bicycle brakes. Stopping just is not a thing.

This often leads to our brains working overtime while we are ready to go to sleep and be done for the day. Which means insomnia is quite normal. It could also mean that since the day has calmed down, our own personal, creative thoughts are able to thrive and we feel the need to work them out. I spent many nights awake writing, reading, and painting in high school. I did not have a regular sleep schedule until this semester, and even then there were some nights I didn't get to sleep until 3 am. And you know what? I was an absolute disaster those days. My inattentiveness was at an all time high on the days I didn't get much sleep. I am moody and much more susceptible to anxiety attacks when I am not rested.

People with ADHD also tend to jump from one project to the to the next without finishing the first project. Which means our work and living spaces may be a bit...cluttered. Or messy. Or it might just look like a disaster area. But please, please don't ever, and I mean EVER move something without telling us you are and where you are putting it. We remember where we put everything. Except our keys and ID's. We never remember where those go. If you find them, please tell us. And yes, we have every intention of completing every single project.

However, we also tend to hyper-focus on a single task. So while we may not work on just one project at a time, we will obsessively focus on one until we burn out and hit a wall with it. Then we will drift around trying to figure out what thing to do next. We might possibly get depressed at this point because we don't know why we can't make any more progress, and now we don't know what to do next. We start to feel a little lost. And that's okay. When I hit a wall, I get really tired and I become very lost and whiney. This is also where the anxious part comes in. If I am not doing something I see as productive, I get very, very anxious and worried that I have forgotten to do something. Which leads to an anxiety attack. This is not a problem for the majority of the people with ADHD, though.

Because our brain is constantly going, we will forget about a lot of things. And I mean, I will forget you answered my question literally three seconds after you answer me and I will ask you again. My poor roommate has reminded me to not forget the tea I made more times than I care to admit. My friends will remind me of what time we are meeting at least three times in a conversation so I only ask them again once.  My mother reminds me of things I need to do  a half dozen times and sometimes I still forget. I'll go to respond and my words will come out nonsense after I jumble up my actual response and my other thoughts. I get stuck on a word and stutter it until my words catch up and my mind slows down a hair. Sometimes I completely forget what our conversation is about...in the middle of the conversation.

I know this is not a comprehensive list of things ADHD people deal with, but it is what I have dealt with from day to day, and what I have seen in my various family members. (Also, all of us that have been diagnosed have very large, outgoing personalities, it makes family get-togethers very interesting). ADHD is a very personal, moldable thing, while the main symptoms are the same in most diagnoses, the things people struggle with vary greatly and can be incredibly personal. How someone copes with ADHD is also very personalized and what helps one person could further mess up another.

I am still learning how to cope without medication even after a year and a half, but I have figured out some things that personally help me. First of all, before anything else, you have to have the mindset that ADHD is not a disorder or a learning disability, it is an abnormal wiring of neurons in your brain. You have to believe that there is nothing wrong with you, you aren't broken or messed up; you have a different way of viewing the world. You have to not think of ADHD negatively, and think of it positively. I think that is the number one most important thing you can do when you decide to start positively coping with it.

Secondly, put yourself on a consistent schedule. Your brain needs routine more than a non-ADHD person. This has been my biggest help this semester. The first half, I really struggled with keeping a clear schedule and it affected my ability to get everything done and my ability to get everything done and my ability to focus on my work.(*Editor's note: do you see what she means? I purposely left that error in her writing.) This cost me some serious grades in my classes. But once I started writing out everything I need to do for the week, the day, the morning, night, my grades went up, my anxiety levels went down, and my sleep improved.

Third, change your diet. This is something that I've known, but haven't done, and I really need to start focusing on it. It is (or at least should be) commonly known that the food you put into your body affects how your  brain and body performs. With ADHD, it is imperative that you treat your body and brain right. Cut out refined and processed foods, sugary foods, up protein intakes, especially plant proteins. Also, I have heard that exercising daily helps as well. This sounds as it should be done in the morning before you start your day to get rid of any excess energy. Like I said, I absolutely need to start working on that aspect myself. Many times, the healthier your physical body is, the more likely your mind will be healthier.

Some of these things I have figured out on my own, some things my mother has shared with me, and others I have discovered through research. The past year and a half been all about discovery, and I have no doubt I still have much to learn. New research comes out all the time, and I am not in a constant state of being. But hopefully I've helped at least one person understand ADHD better, and maybe even understand themselves.

Constantly learning,
Emily E.

As a child, I was selfish, I was greedy, I was mad when things didn't go the way I wanted them to. That is my heart. That is my humanity, it is my nature to want everyone to work their lives around mine, because I am the most important, I am the most valuable person on the planet. I think everyone else is inferior. And that is how I normally think. That is how I normally live. That is my human nature. My sinful, twisted human nature. I don't inherently like people. I think people are ignorant and ugly and rude and annoying. People irritate me to no end. I defined love as people waiting hand and foot on me and appealing to my desires and then leaving me alone. I walk around with a perpetual face of murder. This is how I have been for a very long time.

But then I fell in love with Jesus, because Jesus fell in love with me, and then, not only did He fall in love with me, He showed me. He wooed me, and He pursued me. He ran after my cold, dead, twisted, sinful, hateful heart. And He won it. I accepted the gift of Salvation when I was six, but until a year ago, I played a game, I treated Him like I treated everyone else. I used Him when I needed Him. And He let it happen for so long. But when I saw, when I truly saw, not with my mind and my eyes, but with my heart and my soul, that Jesus loved me so incredibly, selflessly, and completely, it changed my entire life. Now, I see myself as nothing but equal to everyone else on the planet. I have lowered myself and to some point, I have elevated everyone else above me to a degree. I find other people enthrallingly intelligent, beautiful, kind, and pleasurable to be around. I have come to love people (because let's face it, some people are really hard to like). People are a minefield of knowledge and experiences and it's beautiful. I now define love as me giving and pouring out to people, and seeing others do the same in return. I pull out of myself and I give what I can. I learn, I research, and I give my knowledge as much as I can. Granted, I still walk around with a face of murder, but some habits are hard to break. And I am still learning how to live like this.

Love pursued me, loved wooed me. Love saved me. And I can't hold in this love I have. Because this love I feel, I can't not let other people have a chance at feeling it and being saved by it as well. The entire world deserves to know that Jesus loves them. All of them. All the Atheists, the pagans, the Muslims, the Hindus, the Buddhists. All of them do not worship Christ, because they do not know the truth about Him. The downtrodden, the needy, the weak, they do not know the power and strength and hope that love and Jesus has given me. It is by the hope and peace of God that I do not go insane, that my life is not worse than it is, that I do not torture myself because of all that goes on within me. It is that same peace that I wish to give to people.

That is the biggest difference in my life now. I want to give to others, instead of having others give to me. I want to invest in the lives of individuals, instead of ignoring them or meet them in passing. I want to reach out and minister to those who need it the most. I want to give my life as an investment into theirs. And I don't think I want anything in return. The joy of knowing that I have tried to help someone else, and maybe even succeeding in helping is all the payment I need.

Growing constantly, Giving continuously,
Emily E.

Things I Wish the Church Would Get Over and Talk About

There are a lot of things I see wrong with the church. And the more I talk to people here at Liberty, the more people I discover agree with me. I've also met some people who don't agree with me and think I'm a little too liberal in my ideas. But hear me out. I think Christians have set up this "fight or flight" mindset in that if the world around them doesn't agree with them or outright rejects them and their beliefs that they must either set up a wall of defense and stay safe within the church building, or they push their faith on nonbelievers even more and it turns into them setting out on what is essentially a Holy War against them. This seems ridiculous and completely unnecessary. So, here are some things I think the modern Christian needs to stop ignoring or making taboo and start talking about.

Your body is Not Dirty or Evil.
The human body was made exactly how it was meant to be made. God made your body, and no part of that is bad. It's your God given body, and God's Creation was made inherently good. Now, what people decide to do with that body may be wrong, and may be deviant from God's law, but your body is not wrong. Your body is a work of art, and I can only imagine how sad it makes the Artist when you think that it is not good or beautiful or wonderful.

This pertains to a lot of different aspects. Mostly it's this sex-negative mindset that so many Christians teach their children, not telling them the proper names of the parts of their bodies, and telling them lies about their bodies and other people's bodies. I don't know why this is even a problem or an issue. How can your child be comfortable with themselves if they don't even know the real name of the body in their pants? Sex-positive thinking does not say, "Yes, you can have sex whenever you want with whoever you want as long as you keep it safe." It says, "This is your body, these are the parts of your body, and this is how you take care of it. Your body is beautiful and there is nothing wrong with you. You need to make wise, educated choices and make sure you keep yourself healthy and out of danger." Sex-positive thinking is not about liberation, it's about education. You're going to spend your entire life living in your body, and that body is going to do the best it can to keep you alive and protected and give you the chance to live an awesome, wonderful life. But how can you live within something that you know so little about? If your kid has questions, answer them honestly, if you don't know, research. Then tell them in an age-appropriate manner.

Another aspect is in body image. Not only has secular society determined what we think is beautiful and acceptable for both men and women, but the church has followed this adamantly. Not so much in telling people what they should look like, but what they shouldn't look like. Because in some ways, formulating a list of "Do Not" rules, is a lot easier than sitting down and understanding what the Bible says is good for your body and for the Christian idea of body image. So we have so many people, especially women of all ages, who struggle with accepting their bodies natural structure, and who don't understand that everyone has a genetic tendency to a certain weight, and that there is no one healthy weight or shape or size or height. And it isn't just women, I see so many men at church and overhear so many conversations about how they are struggling to keep up with some new diet or work out regime that they have set up for themselves, and it is so disheartening to think that people are trying to push their bodies to be something they aren't. I am not saying it is wrong to want to be healthy or to make active choices in staying healthy. But when we get to a point where we end up worshiping a certain body type instead of worshiping the God who made those bodies, we end up with a power struggle for what has more of our attention.

The Rest of the World Does Not Have to be Held to Our Biblical Standards and Rules.
What???? This is preposterous! Of course, the world has to be held to our standards because our's are right and everyone else is wrong!!

Just...hush. Be quiet, you sound like a child when you say these things. Yes, they may be wrong, and they may not believe the same basic things you do, but guess what? Many Christians say that about other Christians!! In some cases, you have Christians who just inherently believe they are better than every other person in the world, and they think every one else who doesn't believe exactly like they believe is wrong and evil and going to be damned to hell for eternity. And that's an awful, toxic mindset. But it is there, and many of us seem to have a diluted version of this mindset in some way or another. We think that at the end of the day, everyone is still to be held responsible to the Biblical mandates and laws that we are held to. Quite simply, this is not the case. God gives us those laws and such that we may look different than the rest of the world and to shine a light in the darkness. No one but Christians are to be held by other Christians to these standards. No one. Not American society, not Muslims, not Atheists, not any one whom you do not specifically know is a Christian. If you know for a fact that they are a Christian, yes you can hold them accountable to biblical law. But if you aren't certain, then don't shame or condemn another person because they live a different life than you.

It is not our job to change the world's outlook on life as a whole. It is our job to focus on the one, the close, those who are already around us. It is not the job of the Christian or the church to target a specific part of our culture. We should not be trying to change Hollywood, or the LGBTQIA+ community, or the government, or any other group as a whole. One at a time, get close to people, make relationships, invest in individual lives. It's not about the most change you can make in the entire world, it's about the singular lives who are shown the beauty and grace of God's love.

Please Stop Oppressing People.
I know there are people out there that will say that the Christian church across the world is the one being oppressed, and worldwide, yes. But here in the West, we have literally no oppression. We are not being systematically murdered, we are not being discriminated against on a daily and widespread basis. We are not being denied basic human rights for our beliefs. As hard as it is to believe, over the course of history, the Western Church has been the cause of most of the oppression in the world, including the Crusades, slavery, and other minority struggles have been caused by the church and their desire to eradicate all other religions and cultures in the world. (White Man's Burden anybody?) We are not supposed to destroy other people's right to a pleasant and fulfilling life. We are supposed to show them the only true way to fulfillment and Salvation. The only way to do that in our world today seems to be to show love. More specifically, the love of Christ. Why is Christianity not characterized by the Love of Christ anymore? Why are we not known for our outreached arms and outgoing feet? Love is what everyone is desiring for, whether they realize it not, and the ultimate source of love is the Cross. We need to stop pushing shame, and start pushing Love and grace. That is what gets people's attention. Love and caring, not oppression.

Politics are Completely Different than Church Ordinances.
I am not going to bring up an argument about church and state, because I honestly don't know exactly what it is and I have had it explained to me to be several different things, and none of them make a lot of sense. But I do want to remind you, that the pastor can preach about the Bible's moral absolutes, of course, but when they try to get up and say that those moral absolutes should be forced upon the rest of the country or area in which you live through laws with a religious background, that's when we have a problem. A pastor's job is not to tell you how to think politically. It is the job of the pastor to shepherd the church and to guide them to the path of spiritual righteousness. How a person applies that to their political views is completely up to the individual, not the pastor. Please don't abuse the power of the pulpit.

The Country was not Founded Upon the Idea of Freedom of Religion Alone, and it was not Written Into our Constitution Sspecifically and Only for Christianity.
This country was not founded solely for the reason of Freedom of Religion. If anything, we must remember that our country did not fight for nor gain independence until 167 years after Jamestown was founded. This means that there was no correlation between the Pilgrims' reason for leaving England and the Founding Fathers reason for fighting for independence. Everyone who came over on the boats were long dead, and the biggest reason for the War of Independence was taxation. There are not connecting factors there. So please, stop misquoting history, it makes us all seem ignorant when we aren't.  Some of us actually paid attention in high school history class, and a lot more of us know how to look up the real facts on the internet. Our country was not even founded by what most of us would consider Christians. Many of the signers of the Declaration of Independence were Deists, who do not believe in divine providence, nor in divine sovereignty. So, that being said, many most likely did not think to ask God to bless our country, or asked God for anything, because Deism says that God made everything in Creation, then stepped away and has left it alone since then and has no direct involvement with the world.

The World Sucks, Stop Making it Seem Happy.
Look, the world, because it has been enveloped by sin (which is an embodiment of evil, which is the perversion of good), and because of that, the world is an awful horrid place. There is death, there is violence, there is sickness, poverty, greed, abuse. The world, not even our own specific version of our own personal world, is going to be better, or get happier, by becoming a Christian or donating to a church or a Christian organization. Pastors, do not lead the people, who have trusted you to tell them Biblical truth, to believe that which is not true. Show them the heartache and the pain they will feel having to leave family behind because they do not believe. Show them what happens when they decide to accept a gift of holiness and salvation. Show them what other Christians suffer through all over the world, and teach them the selflessness of Jesus to try to help them. Teach them prayer and supplication, teach them mercy. The world sucks, please don't sugarcoat that.

The World is Beautiful, Stop Making it Seem Awful.
The world, while full of evil, is still a part of the Creation of God, who made it in perfection and beauty. IF we look, the world is still full of that beauty. The mountains, the oceans, the fields. The cities, the countries, the villages, all of them are still full of happiness, whether we see it or not. In every place, weddings, births, birthdays are full of joy. Holidays are taken as days of rest and celebration. Throughout every day, there are people blessing other people, spreading happiness, spreading joy, spreading love. Even places where the joy and love of Jesus have never been told of, people have these things, because they set out to have these things. The flowers still bloom, the sun still rises, the forests still stand. The oceans still house an entirely different world, the entirety of the universe is still expanding, still growing, and still burning bright. There is so much we overlook sometimes, because we get so caught up in the bad news, the suffering. We need to remember that all around us, there are children learning to walk, babies learning to laugh, and couples celebrating 50 years of marriage.

I feel like American churches and pastors forget this all so often, and I pray that we don't continue this trend.
Emily E.

Beginnings, Endings, and Learning to Understand Yourself

At the beginning of the semester, I joined the Liberty University Debate Team. On Thursday, I officially left the team. I let go of an amazing opportunity and what some could consider wonderful practice for a future lawyer and I walked away. But why? Why would I dare to let such a thing go?

Because I learned. I learned about how Debate works, and I learned about myself and about how I would do in the sport. But I also learned about how I cope with things. I don't doubt for a single second that I wouldn't have been an excellent debater, I know I would have done amazing. But I also don't doubt that I would have worn myself out. And that is not something I want to do so early on. I already feel so worn down and stressed over everything and trying to balance both Debate and the amount of school work I have to do. After a month, I could not find a good equal balance between focusing my mind on school work and Debate work. I put more focus on school work, because ultimately, that is what is more important to me. And so I talked to my coach and I left. She understood what was going on and how much unhealthy and unnecessary stress I was dealing with and while she was upset that I was leaving, she wished me luck and it was a good parting. The team doesn't know, but since I'm posting this on Facebook later, they will now.

College is a time of learning. It's a time of learning more about the world around you, about the fields you are passionate and studying about, and about how you can interact and become a part of the world and an influencer instead of simply a consumer and a by-stander. It's also a time where you begin to truly learn about yourself and you begin thinking about who you are as a person, about your personality and your virtues and vices. It's where you learn about how you manage your own life and how you, and more specifically your body, deal and manage stress levels you aren't used to.

Last year after about a month being home from Vancouver, I woke up in the middle of the night and I was having trouble breathing. At first, I thought my childhood asthma had flared up and I was having an attack. I had a couple more episodes like this within that same week, and I treated it as asthma with nebulizer treatments until I was actually able to go to the doctor. They checked me out and told me it wasn't asthma, I was fine, they didn't hear any wheezing or general tightness in my chest. I went home and mom mentioned that maybe it was anxiety. I don't like to think of myself as being a relatively anxious person, but when I think about how I normally react to situations, it does make sense. That being said, having some form of an anxiety disorder, as I have not been to a doctor for this, but from my personal research have a pretty clear idea that this is what it is, has been relatively okay to manage. Over the past year, attacks have been minimal and have been rather easy to deal with. I understand that for me, focusing on fixing my breathing is the best thing (breathe in for a few seconds, hold, then let it out for longer and repeat a couple of times), and to tell myself that everything really is okay.

But in the past couple of weeks, I have realized that since I am taking Junior level courses, because I have transferred in with that many credits, I have a much heavier work load than I had previously anticipated. I have more required reading than I have hours in the day, and more need to study than I ever have before. And I was trying to balance that with Debate, and I just simply wasn't able to do so. If I focused on debate, a test was almost forgotten and performed poorly on. If I focused on school, which is what is and should be my  main focus as a student, I had no proof or evidence of my research to show. I think ultimately, I would have simply been a bad Debate partner and team member, and I would not have been able to healthily balance everything. And so now, I have time to actually do my school work, my breathing (which has been in a constant state of difficulty and just general tightness) is getting better, I'm focusing on keeping myself healthy and being the best me that I can be. Will I regret this choice to leave? Maybe. And I do miss the family I stepped into when I joined. Making friends is going to be harder now, but as many know, I make friends rather easily, not quickly, but easily. I am a people person by nature, and I thrive off of company. I don't doubt that my years here will be the best days of my life so far, and I am going to be learning even more about myself, the world that I so achingly love and long to adventure into, and the people who surround me.

Always learning.
Emily E.

Quick Life Update

I have to apologize for not writing so much recently. I am moving in to my dorm at Liberty on Sunday and have been incredibly busy packing. I am leaving a week early because I have joined the debate team and they are having a novice camp next week.

I won't be able to properly write anything for the rest of the week, but I'll try to have a Musical Monday up on time next week. It's been a really long time since I did one of those, but I have a lot of really good songs I want to talk about.

Busy as always,
Emily E.

Beach Memories

So, as some of you may know, I have grown up in Florida. Everywhere I go, I have been asked whether I went to the beach a lot growing up, and I always have to answer yes. Recently, I've been wanting to go back for a day, just to have fun. I've also been thinking about memories about past trips, and which memories are my favorite. And I recall one vividly.

I was camping with a church group, and the teenagers had all decided to go to the beach that was across the street from the campsite. It was a terribly cloudy day, and there was a storm rolling in. We got to the boardwalk and sat there for a while, just talking. It was cold and windy and dark, but it was good. We watched the boys climb the dunes and push each other down, and we sang Disney songs like the silly children that we were.

After we got bored of the boardwalk (haha play on words), we finally walked down to the beach. And it was terrible. the wind blasted the sand against our legs and into our eyes, we felt the ocean spray stick to our arms. But it was wonderful at the same time. The smell of the salt and rain on the horizon, and the gulls were sitting on their nests, waiting for the rain to come. We stood around watching the waves, sticking our feet into the freezing waters. There was a thunderstorm warning, and the foam on the waves was incredibly thick.

It was awful, but yet it wasn't. Because it was one of those moments where I felt a sense of peace that you can  only feel when surrounded by your friends with the natural silence of a collective state of contentment. We didn't care that it was cold. We didn't care that we had sand sticking to us, we had each other, and it was good.

In Canada, I learned of the Hebrew word Tov. Many people sometimes get this word's definition confused with the word perfection. But tov does not mean perfect. It literally translates to "the way I intend to be." It is a word of reverence, of awe and a word of peace. It is that stillness you feel where, no matter what else is wrong with the world, at that moment, everything is okay. It is a word you say with peace, after something beautiful. Many of my beach memories have been ones that I associate with tov. Because at the end of your time there, you walk back up the beach and you look back one last time, and you smile. Because you had fun (hopefully), and something about the beach just makes you feel a little bit closer to nature and to God.

As the weeks pass and the countdown to Liberty gets shorter, I've realized a lot of things. I realize that I'm not going to have the chance to make anymore of those memories. I'll be in the mountains of Virginia, not the beaches of Florida. I'll have more moments of tov,but they wont be the same kind of moments. They'll be mountain memories, which are just as lovely in my mind as beach memories. But I'll have a new set of friends, a new set of souls to share these memories with, and part of me is feeling bittersweet about this. I think my friends and my family and I are all starting to realize that me, and a couple of other friends, are leaving to start a new part of our lives. We are going off to follow God's call for our lives, and we may not ever come back home. And so we have all decided to make this summer, the best summer ever. We have decided that we are going to pack as much into these months as we can. And we still have a lot of things planned. This is going to be a summer of tov. And while some things may not end up the way we think they will be, in the end, the camaraderie and the friendships we deepen and cement are going to be the ones I remember. I'll forget high school memories, but I won't forget the times when we face changes.

Change is scary, I'm not going to lie. I'm going to go away and my friends are going to keep living life without me. And when I come back for visits, things are going to have continued without me. And while I experienced that some when I was in Canada, it's going to be so much harder I think, because I know that I'm going to keep moving on, and I'm going to start my life as an adult, I'm going to be studying to start my career and keep moving forward, and everyone else is going to go in different directions. And while this is normal and is nothing to be afraid of, it still leaves me wondering, what is going to be my next tov moment? Who is going to be with me when I make an everlasting memory?

But, with this idea of tov, I remember that it's not about change, or about perfection, it's about peace. And peace is somthing that I don't naturally have a lot of. And so, I strive for peace in my life. I strive for peace in my worrying, for peace in my decisions. Because that is tov.

Emily E.

Important Life Updates

It has been a while since I have written anything, and I should probably tell you why. I have had a lot of road blocks come up recently, and I wanted to make sure I got over them before telling anybody anything. So, if you have asked me in the past couple of weeks what my plans for the future are and I have given you some vague answers, that is why. (Also, I simply don't like people asking me about my plans for the future. Focus on your own lives, and focus on the now, not the future. It happens when it happens.)

So, first and foremost, what are my plans for school? I am now officially going to Liberty University in the Fall. I am going to get a Bachelor's in English, and I will (hopefully) graduate with that in 2016. I am sending in a video audition for the marching band, and if accepted, I will be leaving early August to start band camp. I will also be applying for work study, preferably for one of the library positions. 

Second, how am I paying for school? Honestly, that is none of anybody's business. But just know that God has provided for me and even though it is not the most preferable method, it is going to get me through.

Third, what are my plans for the summer? You mean, the summer that is half over? Not much, to be honest. I am cleaning out a lot of my stuff and selling it, and I am going to start getting ready for Liberty. I have summer orientation in July sometime, so I will be heading up there for that as well. I also plan on finishing some paintings I promised my mother, so hopefully will get that done. I am also volunteering every other week at our local organic co-op. My friends and I are trying to get as much crammed into this summer before me and my best friend leave in August. I am also trying to do as much fun stuff with my younger brother before I leave, because this is the last summer we really have together, and these are going to be the most vivid memories he has. 

Now, what do I need to do to get ready to leave? So much. Let us make a checklist, shall we?

• Film and send in my video audition for the Spirit of the Mountain band. 
• Attend summer orientation
• Register for classes and meal plans.
• Declutter my possessions and start deciding what I want to take with me.
• Buy band shoes and gloves.
• Buy new school clothes because I have Florida friendly clothes that are not suitable for the Virginia mountains in winter time. 
• Buy new school supplies because I have run out, it seems. 
• Pack everything I need.
• Sign up as a doTerra Essential Oils rep so I can still have those while I am gone. 

I think that is it. So, if you have been wondering what has been going on in my life and what my final plans are, there you go. Also, if you know me personally and you want to meet up with me one last time before I leave, let me know.

Finally seeing some direction,

Emily E.

The Clare Issue

I am livid. I am furious, I am beyond appalled. For those of you that haven't seen the story, or for those of you who live outside the United States, a girl in Virginia was kicked out of her homeschool senior prom over the weekend for an absolutely ridiculous reason.

She was kicked out because the organizers of the event thought her dress, though suitable within dress code and not the shortest one there, was inappropriate and that her dancing, which she was not doing, was also inappropriate and that she was causing "the young men at the prom to think impure thoughts." Not only that, but the way she and the rest of her group was treated by the organizer of the prom was absolutely unprofessional and horrendous.

Here is the story, and here is the follow up post. Please excuse any explicit language you may come across.

Now, there is a lot going on here, and I want to address it all. First of all, go Clare for being excited and comfortable with your body and being able to absolutely rock that dress, and for breaking the racial boundaries that the South is known to have. Your boyfriend seems very sweet and I applaud him in his ability to keep calm during this whole ordeal. To have your significant other called out is a terrible thing and I'm sure this is hard on him and the rest of your family as well.

Secondly, I applaud both Clare and the rest of her group for trying to be as respectful and as mature about the situation as possible. I know at the end things got a little rough, but the fact that they even tried to go about this in a respectable, calm manner means volumes. I know personally, I would have had a fit right there, so I think they deserve a lot of respect for that.

Honestly, I think the teenagers handled this situation the best they could and used their resources and abilities to make the situation known. However, they did lose their temper at the end when they were escorted out, but they all agree that it was the wrong way to go about things.

What I am appalled with, is the way the adults handled this situation. The fact that the fathers, the fathers, were staring and ogling at the teenagers is disturbing as it is and should be addressed as such. There is a terrible, terrible stigma within church culture that it is the father/husbands job to moderate and keep tabs on what their daughters and wives wear. Honestly, I love my father and i respect him. He is the most important man in my life besides Jesus, and if he was uncomfortable with something i was wearing, I wouldn't wear it, and that goes for a majority of girls I know. I highly doubt from everything else I have read that her father would have let her out of the house in that dress had he not felt comfortable with her wearing it.

Secondly, I am disappointed that none of the other adults involved with leading the event got involved. It seems that this was the solely the responsibility of Mrs. D, who called her out both times and caused a commotion in the first place. When the other woman who pulled Clare aside was asked whether she believed it to be too short, she said it wasn't her place to say. So, one we see a woman abusing her power as organizer, and another who is not willing to get on her bad side. When asked, a security guard also said it wasn't his place to comment (which in all fairness, it wasn't. He's a security guard, not the fashion police).

This kind of thing happens all the time. You have one person who has some small leadership role, who blows up the significance of their responsibilities to the extreme, and because of this reason, others are afraid to contradict them. It was that woman's place to say whether or not she agreed with Mrs. D, and she should have given her opinion.

I'm utterly disgusted with the way these young adults were treated, honestly. they were shut down and not given a chance to defend their friend. Clare was falsely accused of dancing provocatively and her friends were not allowed to dispute this. This whole situation was skewed and the argument was one sided. There was no chance at defense, and had this been within a court of law, it would have never, ever been acceptable practice. Also, her entire group of six were given verbal promise of a refund for all having to be kicked out on unjust reasoning, and only Clare and her boyfriend have been given one.

This kind of behavior is disgusting in or out of the church. It is called slut shaming and it is being prejudiced or biased against a person for the clothing they choose to wear, whether it be revealing or not. It is wrong and it needs to stop. I am really really sad to know that church culture is so bad about this. We say we love everybody, yet we give them disapproving glances when they show up in clothing we think is unsuitable.

How dare we.
How dare we think that because we follow a guideline set for or specific religion or our specific denomination that must mean every other person in our presence should follow it too. Jesus Christ compels us, not to judge those around us, but to love them. And I am disgusted, i am appalled, I am livid.

But most of all, I am guilty. I grew up in church culture that didn't advocate this kind of behavior, but it didn't speak against it either. If a woman showed up to church or to anywhere really, and they were wearing something we didn't consider modest, we talked about it. My mother and I talked, my sister and I talked, my friends and I talked. It was harmless gossip, right? Well, looking back, I see how wrong I was. And I am sorry, that I have been a part of the problem. I am sorry that I grew up in a culture that encouraged slut shaming, and encouraged this kind of discrimination. And I fell into that without a second though.

With this whole situation arising, I've begun to evaluate how I feel about the whole modesty movement within churches today. And I realize that there are some things wrong with it. I feel that this post is already long enough, so I will be writing about it in a different post. But let me say right now: Modesty is a matter of the heart, not what you put on your body. It applies to men and women, and it is in no way gender exclusive.

Emily E.

Musical Mondays- My Song is Love Unknown

I don't have any in depth analysis for this. I found this hymn in my hymnbook and I felt like sharing it. This is My Song is Love Unknown, written by Samuel Crossman in 1664. I've never heard this song, but here is a link to a video of it.

My song is love unknown,
My Savior's love to me,
Love to the loveless shown,
That they might lovely be.
O who am I,
That for my sake
My Lord should take frail flesh and die.

He came from his blest throne,
Salvation to bestow:
But men made strange, and none
The longed for Christ would know.
But O my friend,
My friend indeed,
Who at my need His life did spend!

Sometimes they strew his way,
And his sweet praises sing;
Resounding all the day
Hosannas to their King.
Then, "Crucify!"
Is all their breath,
And for his death they thirst and cry.

In life, no house, no home
My Lord on earth might have;
In death, no friendly tomb
But what a stranger gave,
What may I say?
Heav'n was His home:
But mine the tomb wherein he lay.

Here might I stay and sing,
No story so divine;
Never in love, dear King,
Never was grief like thine!
This is my friend,
In whose sweet praise
I all my days could gladly spend.

Life, Peace, and Taking It One Day at a Time

Let's talk about peace. And how it affects our life.

Recently, I have had to go through some things that I should not have been peaceful about. But about two weeks ago, I realized that my relationship with God allows me to live my life without anxiety, without anger, and without worry. My relationship with Christ allows me to live in freedom, with peace and joy. And that's a really big deal.

Because even though I fell in love with Jesus, I didn't live in a very dedicated relationship. I remained devoted to Him because I had a relationship, but that didn't keep my eye from wandering. But a few weeks ago, I realized I had begun to walk away, I didn't care anymore. I was ready to stop going to church, to take a break.

And I got my heart broken. I tried to let someone else take the place of God, and it didn't work. But I made peace, because I didn't need that. It wouldn't have been good for me. And honestly, I'm glad, I'm humbled by the fact that God wanted me enough to call me back.

If some of you remember, I've been dealing with anxiety episodes since about August. And I have come to the point where I can look back and see it was because I was trying to do it myself. I wanted to do it, I wanted to plan my life my way. As I can attest to, and as the Bible warns, it doesn't work out.

You cannot live your life as a Christian, cut Christ out of your life choices, and expect to be successful. It simply doesn't work. I've tried it, my parents tried it when they were younger, I've seen really intelligent people try it. And they've screwed up. And they have all had to live with the consequences.

I also lost my job this week, and yet I have not been stressed about it, I have not been worried finding a new job. I am content with my life as it is right now. I have been going through the financial process with Liberty University, and I have hit some roadblocks. Some other schooling options have opened up, and I have been level-headed in searching for resources. I should not be this calm about it all.

But I have peace. Better yet, I have the Prince of Peace on my side.

So what do I have to fear?
Emily E.

Ruins of a Song

The day you left, the place fell to ruins

The day you left, it let itself go. 

The day you left, the lights stopped turning on.

the day you left, I wrote this song.

And when you return, it'll all be empty.

And when you return, it'll be a wreck.

And when you return, the windows will be knocked in.

But when you return, you'll bring life again.

The day you left, the ceiling started rotting.

The day you left, the chandelier fell. 

The day you left, the floor gave out underneath.

The day you left, the lights burnt out.

And when you return, it'll all be empty.

And when you return, it'll be a wreck.

And when you return the stars will question you.

But when you return, you'll be home.

I wrote this about three months ago, for no real reason other than I saw some pictures of some abandoned buildings. So, it's been sitting in drafts for that long, and I am in the process of working on some really heavy stuff right now. I have posts planned, but they are going to take a while to complete.

Emily E.

Christianity and the Love of Jesus

So last night at church, we were talking about how Jesus told his first disciples to come and see, and follow Him. It got me thinking on Jesus's doctrines and lifestyle in general, and I realized something. Our Christian culture today, when trying to evangelize, tend to use either a fire and brimstone, you're going to hell if you don't believe in Jesus approach, or the happy happy happy everything is fine and dandy approach.

Neither of those are correct, but I want to focus on the fire and brimstone. I think today's North American church is all about getting as many people converted, and they aren't particularly focused on their spiritual health. We are constantly looking for the next soul to save, the next poor tortured person to pull from the grip of Hell, but for what? Where do we go with that conversation after saying, "Congratulations, you are now exempt from the fiery pits of Hell." Well, in a lot of instances, we don't do anything. We say good job, give them a pat on the back, then move on. And frankly, I don't think that's what Jesus would have wanted.

Jesus operated on the idea of love and mercy, not shame and judgement. And I don't think that's taught enough within the church, so it most certainly isn't taught outside of the church. And for that, I am truly sorry.

I grew up in a Baptist Church that became non-denominational while we were there, and I accepted Jesus into my heart at six years old, because I was afraid to go to hell. As a six year old, I was truly afraid, I wasn't looking for a relationship with a Savior, I was looking for a rescue. And after I found that rescue, I wanted to keep my Savior happy by doing what I was supposed to do. I wanted to follow the rules for fear of being punished. I realize now that probably wasn't the best way to go about things.

I am not saying my salvation at six years old was not real, because it was. But when I was in Vancouver over the summer, I didn't just realize that Christ's actions were out of love. I fell in love with a dead Man. Because that's what Christ was about. His actions were always backed by love, mercy, grace, forgiveness. And I saw that in Vancouver. I saw love in action, I wanted to become that love in action. So if you know me personally, and you hear me talk about how amazing Vancouver was, that's why. Because I fell in love with my Savior there.

Imagine it this way: A Prince and his Father looked around and saw that all of their people were doomed. And the only way they could fix it was to send the Prince to die in everyone's place. So He does. He steps down from his throne, willingly, and He lives life like his people. He actually ends up living worse than some of his people. He doesn't have a permanent home, he travels all the time. He goes around trying to woo his people, trying to tell them how much He loves them, and that soon He is going to die for them. And some of them believed Him, and some didn't. But eventually, they all realized that He was right. And some of them got upset, but the Prince said, "It's okay, I'm going to come back." And then He was killed. Brutally, disgustingly, in a way a Prince should not have to suffer. But He did; He was tortured, and he was beaten, and it was deplorable. And He died. And He stayed dead. And his followers, who loved Him, were discouraged, because one day passed, and then another, and still the Prince hadn't come back. But He said He would, they all thought, Surely the Prince would be able to cheat death. But He still did not come back. But the next day, they went to visit the tomb, and they discovered that the tomb was empty. Their Prince was gone! And He was with them again! For more than a month, He spent time with them, until he had to return to the throne. His job was done, and He had to go back to help His Father. But that didn't make Him love His people any less, He just loves them from a position of power.

At 18 years old, after having struggled to justify why I believed what I did, I realized, because I was loved. My entire life had been a process of Jesus wooing me to him through his love and sacrifice. And how, after seeing everything that He had done for me, could I say no?

I couldn't say no. It didn't make sense. I had nothing to live for except for Him, and He had already died for me. So what could I give Him in return to show my love? My life. I gave Him my life. And it hasn't been easy, in fact, I have found that I am just as moody some days now than I was before I discovered this love, but I always manage to catch a glimpse of a little miracle, of a flower opening, or a rabbit in the backyard eating, or of a baby crying, or of the sunset. And I remember, I am loved. And I am in love with a dead Man.

I want to love others that same way. I want to love with no boundaries, with nothing held back. I want to live with love constantly pouring out from every particle of my being. I want to be a walking billboard of love.

Emily E.

International Women's Day

Today is international Women's day and as a woman, I believe I have some words to say on this day. Before anyone asks, I am a feminist. Why? Doesn't feminism go against Christian doctrines? No, it does not. There are many places where the Bible holds women in high regard. The most quoted and probably most obvious place is Proverb 31, which talks about the Virtuous Wife, or the Capable Woman. It states:

"What, my son?
And what, son of my womb?
And what, son of my vows?
Do not give your strength to women,
Nor your ways to that which destroys kings.
It is not for kings, O Lemuel,
It is not for kings to drink wine,
Nor for princes intoxicating drink;
Lest they drink and forget the law,
And pervert the justice of all the afflicted.
Give strong drink to him who is perishing,
And wine to those who are bitter of heart.
Let him drink and forget his poverty,
And remember his misery no more.
Open your mouth for the speechless,
In the cause of all who are appointed to die.
Open your mouth, judge righteously,
And plead the cause of the poor and needy.
Who can find a virtuous wife?
For her worth is far above rubies.
The heart of her husband safely trusts her;
So he will have no lack of gain.
She does him good and not evil
All the days of her life.
She seeks wool and flax,
And willingly works with her hands.
She is like the merchant ships,
She brings her food from afar.
She also rises while it is yet night,
And provides food for her household,
And a portion for her maidservants.
She considers a field and buys it;
From her profits she plants a vineyard.
She girds herself with strength,
And strengthens her arms.
She perceives that her merchandise is good,
And her lamp does not go out by night.
She stretches out her hands to the distaff,
And her hand holds the spindle.
She extends her hand to the poor,
Yes, she reaches out her hands to the needy.
She is not afraid of snow for her household,
For all her household is clothed with scarlet.
She makes tapestry for herself;
Her clothing is fine linen and purple.
Her husband is known in the gates,
When he sits among the elders of the land.
She makes linen garments and sells them,
And supplies sashes for the merchants.
Strength and honor are her clothing;
She shall rejoice in time to come.
She opens her mouth with wisdom,
And on her tongue is the law of kindness.
She watches over the ways of her household,
And does not eat the bread of idleness.
Her children rise up and call her blessed;
Her husband also, and he praises her:
“Many daughters have done well,
But you excel them all.”
Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing,
But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.
Give her of the fruit of her hands,
And let her own works praise her in the gates."

Let's first off realize, that these words are not coming from the man writing, they are a direct quotation from his mother. This is what his mother has taught him, and this is how the author views women. He sees them as wise, strong, virtuous, thrifty, and a leader within the household. He respects women. He does not see them as silent creatures meant only for childbearing and housework, she is the financial analyst, the teacher of the children, the director of the massive play that is the servants and housekeepers. And then, we see in verse 24, "She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies sashes for the merchants." She works to gain an income. Let me repeat that.

In biblical times, the women were allowed and encouraged to make and sell goods as another means of income. I don't know how much I can stress this. Women, if you want to work, even if it is selling things on Etsy or whatnot part-time, then by all means, you can work! I know there are some women who have no desire to work outside of the home, and that is fine. But don't let any religious leader tell you that the Bible does not allow women to work. This is not true, and this theology should not be allowed to oppress anybody.

Let's see what else she does. She does good for her husband and not evil. What does this mean? Well, mainly, don't be disrespectful to your husband. But I think, as some of you are single like me, that it means don't disrespect anyone. She willingly works with her hands; She does things for her family because she wants to. If someone willingly does anything, it is probably something that brings them joy. She finds joy in providing for her family. She rises while it is yet night. I'm not going to lie, this seems to be strangely far-fetched for today's society. No one likes getting up before the crack of dawn, so this seems a little out there for most of us. But it helps her get things done, and have the most productive day possible. She provides food not only for her family, but for her servants as well. She treats everyone with equality and decency. No one under her roof goes without. She is business savvy; She considers a field and buys it. You need fields for one of two reasons. One, for crops. Two, for livestock. Now, in Israel, or at least in the Jerusalem area from what I have learned over the past few years, many people kept their livestock in collective groups, and they had big open hills where they take their livestock, especially their sheep, and as a community keep them and take care of them from there. So, the virtuous woman is most likely buying a field for crops, which means she has to know what kind of plant works with the soil in that field, what time that crop blooms and needs to be harvested, and what kind of profit her household is going to make from the crop. That's a lot to remember. She girds herself with strength and strengthens her arms. She doesn't sit around doing needlework all day, this woman is busy. She is involved in some kind of physical labor. She is not only mentally and emotionally strong, she is physically strong as well. 

She extends her hand to the poor. Again, she treats everyone with decency and respect. She gives what she can to those who need help. She makes sure her household is properly clothed and prepared for all seasons, and she does not fret when the winter comes. She opens her mouth and speaks with wisdom and kindness. There is no anger in her voice. She does not eat the bread of idleness; Again, she doesn't sit around and do nothing, she is an active participant and leader within her own home. Her children and husband call her blessed and give her praise.

So, we see the Bible praises women as an integral part of society and of a household. Women are permitted to work, and women can work and be good mothers. So what does this have to do with International Women's Day? Well, not much actually. But I wanted to show what I base my feminism on.

International Women's Day is all about women's rights. It is about equality for us, and respect for us as a gender. Around the world, women are subjected to violent patriarchal standards, and are not permitted to have the same freedoms that men are. It has gotten better, but is nowhere near where it should be. Women, we are the voice, and we need to stand up for those of us around the world who do not have the liberties that we have in Western society. So many women are forced into prostitution, slavery, and bondage because that is the last resort when you are needing to provide for your family. Women who work, are paid on average, less than half of what men across the globe is.

And you know what? This makes me angry. This hurts my heart. My heart breaks, my soul dies every time I hear a story about how these women across the world are not able to fend for themselves. That girls aren't getting an education they deserve. That they are continuing the cycle of poverty because they have no other choice. And it physically hurts my heart. How do I go about my life, with my set education, and my endless opportunities and say that I have no way to help them? Can I help them? I don't know. I feel so utterly hopeless when I look at the world and see how big the problem is and how small my actions are. 

But you would be dead wrong if you think that ever stops me from trying. That is why I write here. Because even though I do not have the ability nor the means to go and fight for my fellow women's freedoms, I have a voice. And you can bet your bottom dollar I'm going to keep writing until I no longer can. 

Women reading this, you are strong, and you are an integral part of our world. I am sorry for the oppression you may be facing wherever you are in this world, and I am sorry I cannot help you. My heart goes out to all of you on a daily basis, and I pray that you will one day have the equality and freedom that God wants you to have.

Emily E.

Update

I know, I know. It's been two months since I've written a real post. And you all are probably wondering why. Well, for several reasons. This semester has been busier than I thought it would be, and I have had to do a lot of research and writing for a lot of my classes, and I spent all my creative energies on that. I've also been doing a lot of stuff away from the computer, so when I get the idea for a post, I forget it by the time I get to a computer. But mostly, I just haven't been all that inspired to write anything. So, I'm sorry for being absent, but I don't think you are going to be seeing a lot of me in the near future either. There is still a half a semester left, and it is packed full of speeches, concerts, tours, and papers. After that, is graduation and then working my butt off over the summer to have as much money for college as possible before beginning my life at Liberty in the Fall. I'm sorry this is so short, but hopefully I'll have something of substance for you all soon.

Busy and loving it,
Emily E.

Mugshot Metaphor Project Submission

My style is like the weather. Bright, colorful and cheery one day, and sad, bleak, and gloomy the next. My style does not determine my outlook on life, nor does it define my life and my surroundings. My style will lead others to determine how they treat me though, whether it be good or bad. My style is like the weather, strong and confident. It embodies my personality, and it shines through the dark with the power of the sun. My style empowers me, it does not inhibit me. I make the best with what I've got, and I will not let it pull me down. My style is like the weather, ever changing and ever surprising. It changes with the seasons, and it never seems to stay constant. My style is like the weather, powerful and a force to be reckoned with. Not everyone will like my style; not everyone will like the weather. But do not judge me by my style, #judgemebythecontentofmycharacter.

My mind is like a tornado, constantly spinning and going and crashing through life. It takes an idea and turns it on its head, it obliterates it and leaves the pieces behind. It never stops until it runs out of energy, too exhausted to go on any farther. It leaves broken hearts and broken buildings in its wake. My mind is like a tornado. A buildup of pressurized passion mixed with the winds of creativity. My mind is like a tornado, spinning ideas into dreams and dreams into visions, and visions in goals. My mind will leave you bewildered, reaching for a stronghold against it's sheer knowledge. But do not judge me by my mind, #judgemebythecontentofmycharacter.

This was a project i had to do in Advanced Writing. We had to choose an aspect of us that is often misread or misunderstood and make it into a metaphor. I really enjoyed this assignment and thought I would share it with you all.

Emily E.

Domestic Skills and Reading Recipes

 

Last week, I had the opportunity to cook for my family twice. One recipe turned out quite successful, the other one did...not. Well, it did with the help of some maternal intervention. The first thing, some Brazilian cheese bread that is supposed to be for sandwiches (we ate it with our soup like pull apart bread), turned out delicious! I did exactly what the box said, and it all went smoothly. The second dish, a spinach and ham quiche, was almost a disaster. I did not properly read the recipe and almost made a nasty pie. Mom came and checked on it when I put it in the oven and fixed, though.

The recipe called for cream, but we didn't have any, so I just ignored that part. It also said to chop the spinach, which I didn't do. Mom then reminded me, that if I take something out of a recipe, I have to put something else in as a replacement, which in this case would be milk.

I think we as Christians do this sometimes. We will follow the plan God has set out for us, and everything will turn out great. Then we get prideful and say "God, do you see how well I handled that situation? I think I did pretty good, yeah? I don't need Your help this time, okay. Go take care of someone else." And we end up misreading the instructions (the Bible) and making one big mess. And then God steps in and reminds us that we need to read the instructions very carefully and do exactly what they say.

A recipe isn't there to keep you from having fun in the kitchen, is it? No, it gives you guidance on how to make (hopefully) delicious and healthy food that you can enjoy.  The same goes for God's Law. It is not to keep you from having free reign to do whatever you choose. It is there to help us along so that we may get the most out of this life and the next.

We all misread instructions from time to time, but God is good about watching His children and steering them back in the right direction.

Learning to read it all the first time,
Emily E.