So, as some of you may know, I have grown up in Florida. Everywhere I go, I have been asked whether I went to the beach a lot growing up, and I always have to answer yes. Recently, I've been wanting to go back for a day, just to have fun. I've also been thinking about memories about past trips, and which memories are my favorite. And I recall one vividly.
I was camping with a church group, and the teenagers had all decided to go to the beach that was across the street from the campsite. It was a terribly cloudy day, and there was a storm rolling in. We got to the boardwalk and sat there for a while, just talking. It was cold and windy and dark, but it was good. We watched the boys climb the dunes and push each other down, and we sang Disney songs like the silly children that we were.
After we got bored of the boardwalk (haha play on words), we finally walked down to the beach. And it was terrible. the wind blasted the sand against our legs and into our eyes, we felt the ocean spray stick to our arms. But it was wonderful at the same time. The smell of the salt and rain on the horizon, and the gulls were sitting on their nests, waiting for the rain to come. We stood around watching the waves, sticking our feet into the freezing waters. There was a thunderstorm warning, and the foam on the waves was incredibly thick.
It was awful, but yet it wasn't. Because it was one of those moments where I felt a sense of peace that you can only feel when surrounded by your friends with the natural silence of a collective state of contentment. We didn't care that it was cold. We didn't care that we had sand sticking to us, we had each other, and it was good.
In Canada, I learned of the Hebrew word Tov. Many people sometimes get this word's definition confused with the word perfection. But tov does not mean perfect. It literally translates to "the way I intend to be." It is a word of reverence, of awe and a word of peace. It is that stillness you feel where, no matter what else is wrong with the world, at that moment, everything is okay. It is a word you say with peace, after something beautiful. Many of my beach memories have been ones that I associate with tov. Because at the end of your time there, you walk back up the beach and you look back one last time, and you smile. Because you had fun (hopefully), and something about the beach just makes you feel a little bit closer to nature and to God.
As the weeks pass and the countdown to Liberty gets shorter, I've realized a lot of things. I realize that I'm not going to have the chance to make anymore of those memories. I'll be in the mountains of Virginia, not the beaches of Florida. I'll have more moments of tov,but they wont be the same kind of moments. They'll be mountain memories, which are just as lovely in my mind as beach memories. But I'll have a new set of friends, a new set of souls to share these memories with, and part of me is feeling bittersweet about this. I think my friends and my family and I are all starting to realize that me, and a couple of other friends, are leaving to start a new part of our lives. We are going off to follow God's call for our lives, and we may not ever come back home. And so we have all decided to make this summer, the best summer ever. We have decided that we are going to pack as much into these months as we can. And we still have a lot of things planned. This is going to be a summer of tov. And while some things may not end up the way we think they will be, in the end, the camaraderie and the friendships we deepen and cement are going to be the ones I remember. I'll forget high school memories, but I won't forget the times when we face changes.
Change is scary, I'm not going to lie. I'm going to go away and my friends are going to keep living life without me. And when I come back for visits, things are going to have continued without me. And while I experienced that some when I was in Canada, it's going to be so much harder I think, because I know that I'm going to keep moving on, and I'm going to start my life as an adult, I'm going to be studying to start my career and keep moving forward, and everyone else is going to go in different directions. And while this is normal and is nothing to be afraid of, it still leaves me wondering, what is going to be my next tov moment? Who is going to be with me when I make an everlasting memory?
But, with this idea of tov, I remember that it's not about change, or about perfection, it's about peace. And peace is somthing that I don't naturally have a lot of. And so, I strive for peace in my life. I strive for peace in my worrying, for peace in my decisions. Because that is tov.
Emily E.
I was camping with a church group, and the teenagers had all decided to go to the beach that was across the street from the campsite. It was a terribly cloudy day, and there was a storm rolling in. We got to the boardwalk and sat there for a while, just talking. It was cold and windy and dark, but it was good. We watched the boys climb the dunes and push each other down, and we sang Disney songs like the silly children that we were.
After we got bored of the boardwalk (haha play on words), we finally walked down to the beach. And it was terrible. the wind blasted the sand against our legs and into our eyes, we felt the ocean spray stick to our arms. But it was wonderful at the same time. The smell of the salt and rain on the horizon, and the gulls were sitting on their nests, waiting for the rain to come. We stood around watching the waves, sticking our feet into the freezing waters. There was a thunderstorm warning, and the foam on the waves was incredibly thick.
It was awful, but yet it wasn't. Because it was one of those moments where I felt a sense of peace that you can only feel when surrounded by your friends with the natural silence of a collective state of contentment. We didn't care that it was cold. We didn't care that we had sand sticking to us, we had each other, and it was good.
In Canada, I learned of the Hebrew word Tov. Many people sometimes get this word's definition confused with the word perfection. But tov does not mean perfect. It literally translates to "the way I intend to be." It is a word of reverence, of awe and a word of peace. It is that stillness you feel where, no matter what else is wrong with the world, at that moment, everything is okay. It is a word you say with peace, after something beautiful. Many of my beach memories have been ones that I associate with tov. Because at the end of your time there, you walk back up the beach and you look back one last time, and you smile. Because you had fun (hopefully), and something about the beach just makes you feel a little bit closer to nature and to God.
As the weeks pass and the countdown to Liberty gets shorter, I've realized a lot of things. I realize that I'm not going to have the chance to make anymore of those memories. I'll be in the mountains of Virginia, not the beaches of Florida. I'll have more moments of tov,but they wont be the same kind of moments. They'll be mountain memories, which are just as lovely in my mind as beach memories. But I'll have a new set of friends, a new set of souls to share these memories with, and part of me is feeling bittersweet about this. I think my friends and my family and I are all starting to realize that me, and a couple of other friends, are leaving to start a new part of our lives. We are going off to follow God's call for our lives, and we may not ever come back home. And so we have all decided to make this summer, the best summer ever. We have decided that we are going to pack as much into these months as we can. And we still have a lot of things planned. This is going to be a summer of tov. And while some things may not end up the way we think they will be, in the end, the camaraderie and the friendships we deepen and cement are going to be the ones I remember. I'll forget high school memories, but I won't forget the times when we face changes.
Change is scary, I'm not going to lie. I'm going to go away and my friends are going to keep living life without me. And when I come back for visits, things are going to have continued without me. And while I experienced that some when I was in Canada, it's going to be so much harder I think, because I know that I'm going to keep moving on, and I'm going to start my life as an adult, I'm going to be studying to start my career and keep moving forward, and everyone else is going to go in different directions. And while this is normal and is nothing to be afraid of, it still leaves me wondering, what is going to be my next tov moment? Who is going to be with me when I make an everlasting memory?
But, with this idea of tov, I remember that it's not about change, or about perfection, it's about peace. And peace is somthing that I don't naturally have a lot of. And so, I strive for peace in my life. I strive for peace in my worrying, for peace in my decisions. Because that is tov.
Emily E.
