Failure. Disappointment. Not good enough. Chances are, most of us have been called one of these at some point in our lives. Whether it was by a parent, friend, teacher, or ourselves, somehow we all get this label. I can't recall many times where other people have called me a failure, but I know I have called myself one many times over my relatively short life.
Many of these times have been when it comes to the areas of academics and extra-curricular activities. I remember the first time I got an F on an assignment. It was a 3rd grade math assignment, and I didn't see there were more problems on the back. When I got the paper back in my take-home folder that Friday, I was so shocked, I dropped the folder on the floor. I had never gotten anything below a B (I think), and I was so scared. I remember thinking I was going to be in so much trouble when mom goes through the folder. I then sat and gave myself a very harsh mental scolding, saying that I was stupid, and why didn't I check the other side of the paper, and GOSH you are an idiot, Emily. Stupid, stupid, stupid...
Another time, in 7th grade band, we were having our last chair testing to see who would play what part at the end-year recital, and I had been 1st chair the entire year, so I was really cocky about this test. Ends up, I was a little too confident, and ended up messing up terribly. I ended up going from 1st to 5th. There were eight clarinet players, so that was a pretty bad. I'm pretty sure I cried myself to sleep that night, after thoroughly beating myself up mentally for being such a terrible musician, and you don't deserve to even be in symphonic band, who do you think you are, you'll never be good enough, you should just quit, you sorry excuse of a clarinetist...
Of course, thanks to my parents being godly people, I've never experienced that kind of verbal abuse from them, or anybody now that I think about it. Of course, many people are never told by others that they are failures, they thrust those ideas upon themselves, which leads them to believing them for their entire lives if they're not careful.
As Christians, we are not promised that we will succeed in everything we try. Christ never said life after salvation was going to be an easy, breeze through everything you do kind of endeavor. No, life is going to be hard, there are going to be challenges that you are going to face, things that you are going to have to do, and as hard as it is to admit, sometimes you're going to come short of your own goals.
And you know what? That is okay. Nobody but you can give you the drive for you to achieve, no one else can place your goals upon you. Only you can do that. So when you don't quite make it to those goals, the only person you're letting down is yourself. Everyone else is just proud that you took on that challenge. They didn't hold you to an impossibly high goal, and if they did, it was because they believed in you, not because they wanted to see you fail. You tried, and that is good.
Earlier today (2/16/13), I got my scores for the January SAT, and my score was about 300 points away from being eligible for the largest Bright Futures Scholarship (the Bright Futures Scholarship is a scholarship program by the state of Florida that is given to outstanding or exceeding students, and is funded through lottery money). I was really confidant in my scores, and I thought I might have a chance, but I added them up, and I just barely missed the mark. I was so disappointed, but then I looked back at my scores. My math score had gone up 80 points. I went from a 490 to 570. I actually got in the 500's in math this time. This was my fourth time taking the SAT, and I finally got a math score in the 500's. That was one good thing. The other good thing was I still over-qualified for the second-highest scholarship. And there is always the March SAT if I want to take it again, but I don't think I will.
There are two ways to approach your apparent failure. You can either wallow in pity and self-depreciation, or you can analyze what happened, and find the good in it. What did you learn from this? After turning in a half-done assignment, I learned to always check and make sure I did everything that was asked of me. After dropping to 5th chair, I learned to not let my abilities get to my head, and that I still needed to practice, even if I was better than everyone else without it. I'm not quite sure what I learned from the SAT yet, other than it is an evil test, but I'll let you know when I do.
Smiling through the problems,
Emily E.
Many of these times have been when it comes to the areas of academics and extra-curricular activities. I remember the first time I got an F on an assignment. It was a 3rd grade math assignment, and I didn't see there were more problems on the back. When I got the paper back in my take-home folder that Friday, I was so shocked, I dropped the folder on the floor. I had never gotten anything below a B (I think), and I was so scared. I remember thinking I was going to be in so much trouble when mom goes through the folder. I then sat and gave myself a very harsh mental scolding, saying that I was stupid, and why didn't I check the other side of the paper, and GOSH you are an idiot, Emily. Stupid, stupid, stupid...
Another time, in 7th grade band, we were having our last chair testing to see who would play what part at the end-year recital, and I had been 1st chair the entire year, so I was really cocky about this test. Ends up, I was a little too confident, and ended up messing up terribly. I ended up going from 1st to 5th. There were eight clarinet players, so that was a pretty bad. I'm pretty sure I cried myself to sleep that night, after thoroughly beating myself up mentally for being such a terrible musician, and you don't deserve to even be in symphonic band, who do you think you are, you'll never be good enough, you should just quit, you sorry excuse of a clarinetist...
Of course, thanks to my parents being godly people, I've never experienced that kind of verbal abuse from them, or anybody now that I think about it. Of course, many people are never told by others that they are failures, they thrust those ideas upon themselves, which leads them to believing them for their entire lives if they're not careful.
As Christians, we are not promised that we will succeed in everything we try. Christ never said life after salvation was going to be an easy, breeze through everything you do kind of endeavor. No, life is going to be hard, there are going to be challenges that you are going to face, things that you are going to have to do, and as hard as it is to admit, sometimes you're going to come short of your own goals.
And you know what? That is okay. Nobody but you can give you the drive for you to achieve, no one else can place your goals upon you. Only you can do that. So when you don't quite make it to those goals, the only person you're letting down is yourself. Everyone else is just proud that you took on that challenge. They didn't hold you to an impossibly high goal, and if they did, it was because they believed in you, not because they wanted to see you fail. You tried, and that is good.
Earlier today (2/16/13), I got my scores for the January SAT, and my score was about 300 points away from being eligible for the largest Bright Futures Scholarship (the Bright Futures Scholarship is a scholarship program by the state of Florida that is given to outstanding or exceeding students, and is funded through lottery money). I was really confidant in my scores, and I thought I might have a chance, but I added them up, and I just barely missed the mark. I was so disappointed, but then I looked back at my scores. My math score had gone up 80 points. I went from a 490 to 570. I actually got in the 500's in math this time. This was my fourth time taking the SAT, and I finally got a math score in the 500's. That was one good thing. The other good thing was I still over-qualified for the second-highest scholarship. And there is always the March SAT if I want to take it again, but I don't think I will.
There are two ways to approach your apparent failure. You can either wallow in pity and self-depreciation, or you can analyze what happened, and find the good in it. What did you learn from this? After turning in a half-done assignment, I learned to always check and make sure I did everything that was asked of me. After dropping to 5th chair, I learned to not let my abilities get to my head, and that I still needed to practice, even if I was better than everyone else without it. I'm not quite sure what I learned from the SAT yet, other than it is an evil test, but I'll let you know when I do.
Smiling through the problems,
Emily E.
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